5 Practices for Recognizing Your Worth Beyond Work
We all do it. You do it, our friends do it, even I do it sometimes.
Wrap our sense of self worth up in the work we do. Forget that the very miracle of our existence (of all the people who could have been born and become you, you did it. What magic.) And yet we have been taught since we were quite little that the only things that make us special are external—how hard we work, what our title is, who we work for, and what they pay us.
But do you want to know something they don’t want us to know? That’s a lie.
It’s a lie that leads to burnout, sickness, and a very confused sense of identity. Especially if we lose our jobs and they were the thing connecting us to a sense of self and purpose. It’s a lie that keeps you working beyond your capacity and feeling like you’re not doing enough.
So what can we do about that?
Well change. Make a shift. Untangle your sense of self worth from your work. We’ve written before about the signs that your identity is tied up in your job. Now we want to share with you practices to untangle your sense of self and worth from what you do.
So a few tips and practice for recognizing your worth beyond work.
Reconnect with or explore new hobbies. The best way to separate your identity from work is to do something outside of work that we can identify. BUT don’t get caught in the Millennial trap of finding something you love and turning it into a side hustle. Just enjoy it.
Ask the people who love you who you are to them. Usually your parents or kids or partner don’t see you as a senior marketing manager or whatever title you hold. They see you as the person you show up as outside of work in the ways you care for them and connect with them. Hold onto that because that' is more of who you are.
Volunteer. Try something new outside of work that involves working. To contribute to something that matters to you and gain a sense of appreciation for the life you have and the ways you’re able to show up in it.
Sit with yourself. You heard me. It may sound awkward but set aside some time to just be with you in the quiet and see what comes up. If you have space and desire, journal a bit to explore the thoughts and ideas that come up. When you’re done, write down: “I am ____________________________” and fill in the blank with who you are now and who you’d like to reflect more of. Not just the good stuff and personal connections but also the things that make you uniquely you e.g. “curious” or “exuberant.”
Start introducing yourself in social settings without mentioning work. If you want to really challenge yourself do it without mentioning you job, your age, nationality, your ethnicity, or your location. And be kind to yourself with what comes up—this isn’t an easy practice. Once you get comfortable with it, try asking about new people you meet in ways that don’t bring up their jobs. Instead of what do you do for a living, how about what do you do for fun in your free time?
And this doesn’t mean you’re not allowed to love your job or the work you do, it just means you start to recognize your inherent value. Something that exists outside of what you do for a living and contribute to you doing great work. This shift is a key step in eliminating burnout and thriving in life and work. So we hope you try it.
